A Roller Coaster of Emotions

Today I had a checkup with doctor to do blood work and ultrasound. I recently colored my hair (for the 100th time) and all the nurses were commenting on my hair. The simple compliment lead to us laughing about all sorts of stuff. My husband is in love with blonde hair. He doesn't care too much for any other color but has adjusted to my many colors. Last year I decided to color my hair because it would be easier to maintain when I got pregnant. I didn't want to bleach my hair while being pregnant and I was ready for a change. Well I went from a light brown, to dark brown, to red, and now to another color. It doesn't help that my best friend is a hair stylist and we always come up with a new color to try on my hair. Anyways, the nurses were teasing my husband about that and other stuff and we all were laughing. They love teasing him. After all the laughs it was time to go into the room to do the ultrasound. The doctor came in and I began asking him a million questions. We talked about the different reasons why we lost the three embryos in the chromosome testing. It was nothing that we passed down from or genetic history or anything. It was all the same reasons why a lot of other couples lose their embryos during chromosome testing. We talked about Mikie being a girl producing machine. The first time we did this we ended up with 7 girls and 3 boys. We still have 4 girls left over from the first time and now we have an additional 3 girls and 1 boy. I also talked to the doctor about my Estrogen level. I follow a bunch of different IVF facebook pages and websites. I've noticed that a lot of people talk about how high their Estrogen levels get with injections. My level never reached 3000. I asked the doctor today if that was normal. He commented about how observant I am and explained the different reasons why mine doesn't. It is really frustrating with IVF because there is so much unknown science to the whole journey. Mikie gets a little frustrated when we ask questions and the doctor doesn't have a straight answer. I explained to him today that there is no straight forward answer to the questions we ask. Each person's body reacts differently to stuff and really the doctors are playing God. God is the only one who truly understands how the magic is done to create these embryos and what all it takes. While it is exciting that we have these scientist that can help create these miracles, they will never know everything about the process. It is pretty much impossible. During this doctors visit we spent about an hour between signing papers, blood work, and speaking with the doctor. We are normally in and out of there but I had a ton of questions. I'm sure I really make his brain work in the morning with all my questions. I just read a ton about IVF and I follow so many other couples and I get curious. I've learned more about the way a baby is made than I ever imagined learning. I'm sure you've even thought to yourself while reading my blog that you have too. Science is amazing and I thank God every day that we have scientist that can help us have a miracle baby. After speaking with the doctor we went out to talk to the nurse. She confirmed all the medication was ordered and that if my blood work came back good then I would start on medication tomorrow. I asked her if I start on medication tomorrow then when will my transfer be. She told me that it would be on Thursday, February 12th!!!! Well blood work came back and everything is good to go. I start on my medication tomorrow. No needles right now just a few pills to take. I'm allergic to the patch that most women are put on so I only take the Estrogen pills. This go around I have to take a low dose of aspirin everyday as well.  Holy Cow.......in 3 weeks we will be transferring two embryos. We will find out results two days after Mikie's birthday and two days before my best friend's baby shower that I'm cohosting. I'm a roller coaster of emotions.....I don't know what to feel. I'm excited, nervous, happy, scared, etc. I was so excited when we left and called my best friend to tell her the news. She started to feel all the same emotions for me and I was so involved with our conversation that I didn't realize I was speeding. I got pulled over today and received my first speeding ticket in over 10 years!!!!! I couldn't believe it but you know I wasn't even mad. It was my fault for speeding and the state trooper was only doing his job.


Well it looks like February 12th is going to be the BIG day!!!! :) And then February 26th will be the pregnancy result day which is another BIG day! I'm a roller coaster of emotions but I'm really keeping my faith. I don't want to be too excited, I don't want to be a Debbie downer, but I'm leaning on my faith to keep my emotions level. I really think this is our time. If it is our time then we will meet our bundle of joy in October! Please keep your prayers coming....they mean so much to Mikie and I both. We could never thank all of you enough for the support. We have had so many people reach out to us...from strangers, family, old friends, new friends, etc. I believe this blog has helped keep our faith strong and been a good therapy for myself to not keep everything bottled up. I spoke about our experiences in the past with friends when we were going through it but its not the same as blogging. I really can write out all the things I feel and I can share with everyone. For those of you with fertility issues that are reading my blog....I hope I'm giving you that extra strength to keep pushing on. Don't give up!!!