Looking Good....

Mikie and I for once in three years kicked back and enjoyed ourselves. We are not the drinking kind. Ask us nine years ago when we first met and Mikie will tell you the story he tells everyone. He thought he was in for a wild drinking woman. Lol. I grew out of that stage very early in our relationship. Sometimes you have to grow up and realize drinking isn't everything. I much rather have a hard working man over a bar fly any day of the week. Anyways, Saturday we were invited by some friends to go to the KC Hall to enjoy all you can eat crawfish. Its my first year to really enjoy crawfish. I would eat them in the past but just a bite here and there. This year I've actually been ordering my own and peeling them. We ate until we were stuffed and then we hung out and drank. I couldn't believe that my husband drank. If I'm drinking he doesn't like to drink because he wants to be alert for anything that could happen to me. (I chose a great man) On Saturday we finally just relaxed and drank for a couple of hours. Everyone was shocked to see him drinking and with a little alcohol he loosened up. I have to say that in the last year that we both haven't drank hardly anything. We have been so up tight and serious about our journey and I've been on too many fertility drugs. It was nice to unwind and enjoy life. He wasn't worried about his businesses and I wasn't stressed about work or baby stuff. It does help that we have some amazing friends that help us unwind. We are so lucky to have good people in our life. Of course we always have those who aren't happy for us and who love that we are suffering through this rough journey. I don't even get mad...I just laugh and know that karma will come back around. It always does and always will. I've learned that those negative people are not truly happy for themselves; therfore, how can they be happy for us and our journey. Misery loves company and jealousy is a terrible sickness. All you can do is keep your circle full of positive people and go on with life. Luckily we haven't faced too many negative people but you always have a few bad apples.

Today we had Jade's first appointment since she started medicine. I'm not going to lie....I was very nervous. I got to the appointment early and waited on Jade. She was running a few minutes late because she had a little bit of a stressful morning. Once she got there we checked in and waited to be called. The nurse came to get us and she went to get her blood drawn. I didn't go back to the blood area but stood and talked to the nurses. I know I've said it a 100 times but I love the Katy office. They are so sweet and caring. We talked about our weekends and laughed about the cookies they had. They make these sperm and pregnancy test cookies for fertility awareness week. Once Jade was done with blood work we went into the room for her ultrasound. The doctor had surgery today so we saw the nurse. She came in to do the ultrasound and was very pleased with Jade's lining. It was a 7 and needs to be a 9 by next week which it will be. We talked about medicine and TMI stories of what the medicine does to your body. We laughed and laughed. I swear I never leave their office without laughing at some point. Once Jade got dressed we scheduled another appointment for Friday. Friday will be the last appointment until transfer day. She will start her injections on Saturday!!! We stood around talking to the nurses and sharing stories for a little bit. They always take the time to listen and laugh with us. Both of my nurses have me on facebook and told me how much they enjoy my blog. I love when people tell me that because I love blogging.

Well we are now only 10 days away from transfer day!!!!! I'm so excited and cant wait. We decided that we all three are going to wear our team HFI shirts. Its our something green. I'm so anxious for transfer day and then I will be anxious for testing day! I have high expectations for this round but trying to stay level just incase it doesn't work. Jade did mention that she isn't going to give up on us. She will fight until our dreams come true. I've got to say that I feel like I've gained a little/big sister. She is little and younger than me but she stands up for me as if she was my big sister. Her determination, support, and love is one of a kind. I couldn't have chose anyone better to be my tummy mummy!

The man I wake up to every morning. My hubby!

Sperm and Pregnancy test cookies! ;) 

Everyone has been wondering what Jade looks like pregnant. This was delivery day for her last surrogacy. Now if she ends up with twins...we have no idea what she will look like. We laughed about how big she would look today with the nurses. Lol

I haven't posted a picture of my nephew in a while. Here is my cutie pie and his mommy aka my best friend! ;) 

Jade's son (I call my boyfriend) and Baby Hutch! ;) 

Our friends who have been by our side through it all. They are there to deliver food, lend a hand, or a shoulder to cry on. We are so lucky to call these two our friends! ;) 

Day by Day

Last Sunday was the The Walk of Hope to support infertility awareness. My cousin, Autumn Jaynes, surro mom Jade, and friend Kourtlyn Hartfield came to support me. It was an early morning and had my niece with me. We headed in town to meet Autumn and then went to pick up Jade. It turned out to be a beautiful day. I was so excited to have a support system with me at the walk. Autumn and Kourtlyn got to meet my doctor. We all meet my doctor's wife and son. His wife is just as friendly and sweet as him. It was nice to see the whole office outside of the clinic in normal clothes and with their families. We got our shirts and ate a little breakfast before the walk started. There was a big gathering and a few speakers before it started. Once the walk started people lined the walkway with posters saying "You are not alone".  It was amazing to see the people who joined together for a cause that hits home. I loved having my family and friends there to support me as well.

Monday Jade started her medicine. I was so excited on Monday but it felt a little weird not taking the medicine myself. She kept me updated on how she was feeling and we talked about all the TMI information. Its so nice to compare ourselves to each other. She is hoping since she has been doing alot of squats that she has more muscle for the injections. Ha! She said I beat her in the butt department. I laughed and agreed! When I told Mikie I was going to work out he said don't lose your butt. HA! It's crazy but my butt muscle is still sore from those injections. Its been almost two months since my last shot. It goes to show you how tough those shots are. I don't think I will feel weird when she starts those shots! Sorry Jade! :)

Monday was also the beginning of National Infertility  Awareness Week. 1 in 8 couples face fertility issues. Mikie and I are just another statistic. Its been a rough, long, and emotional journey. I do have to say that we've learned so much about ourselves, marriage, faith, and others. I never imagined that when I started this blog that I would gain such a HUGE support system. I've learned that family isn't always blood. Our family has grown so big and our circle of friends has too. When we are down you all pick us up and when we are up you all continue to cheer for us.

Kristina and Jade started a gofundme page for Mikie and I. They wanted to start one a while back and we all got busy. On Tuesday they finished the page and posted it on facebook. I was surprised and happy. Mikie and I have spent thousands and thousands of dollars. We agreed to keep spending what we need to until our dreams come true. Our insurance covers NOTHING. Both of our families have helped us out alot but we are still faced with a big financial burden. In a little over 4 days we have raised 2600.00 because we have had a few people donate to us personally. I'm amazed at the support we have received. I want all of you to know that Mikie and I appreciate it. We will never be able to thank all of you enough. I know not everyone has the extra money to donate but please know your support still means alot. You reach out to us, you cheer on the sidelines, and you support reading my blog. No amount of money can equal that. Here is a link to the page if you do want to donate.

http://www.gofundme.com/teambabyfisher

Beasley bash was discussed the other night with our friends. It is so crazy to think that I gave Mikie my number nine years ago at the good ole Beasley Bash. I never thought that six years later we would get married and nine years later we would be on a surrogate journey. I'm so thankful that God chose me to become his wife. He is my biggest supporter and fan. I also never dreamed of living in a small town like Sealy. I love our small town and all the friends we have here. A small town comes together and supports one another. We have found that in our town. I look forward to raising my little girl or girls here.

Monday we have a check up appointment for Jade and we are only 11 days away from transfer!!! Yay! We are taking it day by day but these days sure are flying by. I'm ready for May 7th!!!!!!!

Jade, Dr. Kim, and myself at the walk

Jade and I with one of my favorite nurses. She has always been there for me since the day I stepped into the clinic. She is more than just a nurse to me! 

For NIAW week I made this grid to post online. #niaw #resolve #Wearenotalone 

I love my little niece to pieces. She walked the entire walk! She was such a trooper for her Auntie! 

My supporters! ;) Baby Case was sleeping! 

The bond between her and I is unbreakable. 

I never really do my nails but I make sure to do them for each transfer. They are ready for my little girls to be transfered on May 7th

 #teampink #teambabyfisher 

Audrina loved Jade. Mikie said it's because Jade is a big kid herself. Ha! We all love Jade! ;) 

Ready, Set, Go.......

Friday, April 10th Jade went in for her SIS procedure to check her lining. I didn't go to this appointment with her. She sent me pictures during the appointment and kept me updated the whole time. She passed through that with flying colors. She said "Dr. Kim said everything looks good so I asked him Good? or kind of  good? or Great?" and Dr Kim replied "Great" She did snap a picture of him while she was spread eagle on the table. She has no shame. I was dying laughing at the office when she sent me the text message. She posted the picture on facebook and my lawyer commented on her picture saying "I don't know if I told you or not but Dr. Kim's wife and I were good friends in college" Wow talk about a small world. I do have to say that I feel so comfortable with Jade because I know she will keep me included in everything. I plan on to be all the appointments but decided not to go to that one.

Over the weekend we both turned in the signed copies of the contract. So the contract process is complete 100%. Now my lawyer is waiting for the first trimester to be done so we can draw up the Birth paperwork to present to the hospital stating that Mikie and I are the parents. I do have to say that I'm so glad Jade recommended my lawyer. She has been so prompt on everything and responds quickly to all my emails. I have to say that the contract was the smoothest process. I think also because Jade and I were so open with each other and talked through the pricing and everything.

Monday rolled around and Jade began to contact our donor nurse. Jade always puts me on copy when she emails our nurse. She started to ask what the next step was and when could we make our baseline appointment. The nurse told her she was waiting on Jade's pap smear record. Jade got that sent over to her right away. After that she sent over a calendar with all of our dates and it had the transfer for May 14th. (YAY! I was jumping for joy in my office) Jade contacted me and said she wanted to see if she could go in for baseline appointment on Friday when we had our counsel session. I told her I was fine with that and she could contact her. (I love Jade's persistence! I'm not a very pushy person and she is, which is good.) The nurse wrote back and informed us that she received Jade's pap smear record and she could go ahead and make her baseline appointment for Friday, April 17th the same day as our counsel session. She called the Katy office and they worked her in. Mikie and I had to be in Memorial City area by 9am and I was afraid we wouldn't make it if we went to her baseline appointment and then had to drive there. Jade went by herself and sent me a message as soon as she left. She said "Everything looks great". I was so relieved. Now we just had to wait on her blood work to make sure her levels look good. Mikie and I were driving to the counsel session and we both were a little stressed. We both didn't know what to expect or what she was going to ask.I told Mikie to answer her questions honestly and to be himself. She isn't there to change you or make you think differently. She is there to make sure there is good communication between all of us. He thought the process was a little "stupid" but its because he didn't understand the reasoning behind it. Plus some people who talked to us were referring to her as the "quack doctor". I cannot stand people who refer to therapist or psychologist as that. Most of the people who make fun of them are the ones who need to go see one and have a few issues themselves. We had our appointment at another fertility clinic called Houston IVF. We stepped off the elevator on the 23rd floor and the clinic had the entire floor to themselves. It was a beautiful clinic but you could tell it was strictly a clinic. The waiting room of my clinic seems much more inviting and comforting. The counselor has an office at that location but works with all clinics. We were sitting in the waiting room and our nerves just kept increasing. Jade ended up showing up right before we had to go back. She calmed us and told us to be ourselves. We were called back and walked into a little room with a couch and two chairs. Mikie and I sat on the couch and she sat in the chair. Leslee (the therapist) began to ask all sorts of questions from "How did you meet" "How long have you been married" "Is this your first marriage" etc. After she began to find out a little bit about us then she began to ask about our journey and what led us to surrogacy. We touch a little bit about the surrogate route and the relationship we have with Jade. She was very impressed with all the things that we had discussed with Jade. She said we were very open with each other and she loved the communication level we have with each other. Overall we made a very good impression on her. After our hour session, Mikie and I went back to the waiting room. Jade and Ryan went back to talk with Leslee alone before we all had to meet together. The meeting with all four us went very well. There was not a whole lot to talk about during our joint meeting because our communication between each other has been so well. We laughed a lot and talk about some important things that we had not discussed. After the counseling session, you really figure out why they have this in the process. She explained to us that most couples go through an agency and sometimes the counsel session is the first time they meet each other. YIKES! Leslee is pretty much a mediator and is there for the difficult questions or disagreements. Fortunately, we do not have any disagreements with Jade. We did agree that our child will call Jade, Auntie Jade. She will never be referred to as birth mom or anything mom. The counselor did explain that we never use the term mom with Jade. Mikie and I are the mom and dad. We did agree that when our child understands we will explain the surrogate journey to them. After all, I do have this blog that I hope they get to read one day.

Yes this journey is sort of a job for Jade but I think this journey is a lot different for her since we are not strangers. She has a huge heart and is all for anything Mikie and I want. So we all laughed as we walked out saying "Hmmmm we aren't so crazy after all" LOL!

As we were leaving the counsel session, I received a phone call stating that Jade's blood work looks great. The nurse said she will start medicine on Monday and transfer will be...............MAY 7TH!!!!! We are so excited!!!! The nurse said "I wanted to call you and inform you before we called her" It is so nice to know that we are still the first ones who get the results. Yes it's Jade going through this but it's our baby. They will call us with all results before they let Jade know.

After the counsel session and great news, we all went to lunch together. Mikie and I took them to eat and we celebrated the good news. I have to say that this lunch meeting was much more relaxed compared to the dinner meeting. HA! Mikie and Ryan talked all about truck and mechanic stuff. Ryan and Jade had us rolling with some of their stories of when they first dated. Mikie and I were almost in tears laughing so hard at them. It was so nice to see all four of us relaxed and laughing. We sure have come a long way since day one. :)

After lunch, we all decided to go back up to Dr. Kim's office to sign consent forms. We had to sign these before a certain date. Jade signed hers when she went in for her baseline appointment but Ryan, Mikie, and myself had to sign them too. We all signed them and laughed with the nurses. I truly love my office! They always bring a smile to your face and you can guarantee that Mikie will always make them laugh. We talked about the fertility walk that is coming up on Sunday. Jade, Autumn (my cousin's wife) and I are going to walk to support fertility awareness. I'm so excited to be apart of this walk.

Once our eventful day of doctors was done. I decided to call Kristina and see if she would let her brother watch Hutch. I told her that I wanted her to get out of the house and go get a pedicure. Ryan and Jade agreed to babysit and I got her out of the house for at least 2 hours. We got pedicures and nails done. She thanked me a 100 times for getting her out of the house. I know she really needed a break seeing how she hasn't gotten a break since the day Hutch was born. She hasn't done much for herself. Hutch is battling acid reflux really bad and cries almost all day long. They recently changed his medicine and we are praying this is the fix. She has had some emotional break downs as any new mom would have. I sent her a text saying "I'm so proud of you. You are an amazing role model for me. I hope I am at least half the mom you are. Keep your head up. Even on your weakest moments remember I look up to you and love you the most" She wrote me back stating how I made her cry and that she is so proud to call me her best friend. A lot of people have explained to me my strength I have to be around new born children and pregnant friends. I think it isn't hard with Kristina because I love watching Kristina be a mom. I know how bad she wanted to be a mom before she got pregnant. It wasn't easy for her but it wasn't as tough of a struggle as it is for me. I think its an eye opener too that yes couples have been blessed with children but we all struggle somewhere. Mikie and I struggle getting pregnant, Kristina struggles with Hutch's acid reflux, some couples struggle with medical conditions of their children, etc. We all face some type of struggle; therefore, we should never judge anyone.


Next week is fertility awareness week and I cant help but look back on our journey. Its been a long and hard journey but each step made us stronger. We are not the same people who walked into that clinic a year ago. We've grown so strong in our faith and in our marriage. We have gained so many supporters and friends. I did mention to Leslee that I blog and I've gained so many supporters. I told her it makes my hard times easier and my tears turn into smiles. Its because of each of you who read this blog and who reach out to me that make this journey less painful. I think it also helps that the Ohl/Helm family is so loved and all of their friends have now become our friends and supporters. I want to thank each of you from the bottom of my heart for everything. I'm so excited about what is to come. I have a lot of faith in this journey with Jade. I do believe that we will be holding our little girl or girls in January. Our arms anxiously wait for that day!

The man God chose me to marry. I'm so lucky and blessed to call him my hubby. We were waiting for Jade and Ryan to finish their session and for us to go in for the joint session.

I dropped my mom off at the airport earlier this week. She went to Australia to meet my dad. They are doing a little vacation together. I love watching them live life together! They are truly an inspiration to me on love and marriage.

Some of my AWESOME co workers. I work with some amazing women who have supported me during my entire journey. They are one of the reasons why I commute so far to work!

Another coworker who has supported me. Now she is my workout partner. Bye Bye Fertility drugs...hello gym!

My handsome nephew, Hutch! He is such a little stud muffin! He sure does love his Auntie Tori.

He looks so peaceful and sleeps just like his daddy...mouth wide open!

New Page, New Chapter

Today began the new page of our new chapter!

Last Tuesday I left work early because I was not feeling well. I decided to leave early to go to the doctor before it got worse. I drove right to the urgent care in my town and got some medicine. I left the doctor and came home to go to bed. I woke up around 7pm and couldn't breathe. I sent a text to my step mother in law and asked her to come over. She called me and I barely could talk and it scared the crap out of her. Mikie was working late at the shop in Rosenberg and I was home alone. She and my father in law came over. When they got to my house, I began to wheeze and struggle to get air. She called 911 and the paramedics came out. I was able to get my inhaler and breathing machine to help me breathe. The paramedics stayed until my heart rate went back down and I refused treatment to go to the hospital. Can you imagine what that ambulance ride would have cost seeing how I live in the middle of no where. It scared the crap out of Mikie and he made it home in 10 minutes or less when it normally takes him 30 minutes or more to get home. He stayed with me the rest of the night and kept making sure I was breathing throughout the night. Sometimes I feel like I never catch a break. I've been really stressed with all the changes at work and I think it got my immune system down. I've also noticed that I've been losing a lot more hair lately and everyone keeps telling me its the stress. Some days I thank God for not letting me stay pregnant this last round. I've I had way too much go on in life with work, illness, and stress. I think it would have been a bad deal if I would have stayed pregnant.

Wednesday night, I received a phone call at 11pm. It was Ryan (Jade's husband) calling me to scream over the phone that Jade started her period. I was dead asleep and plus since I've been sick I sound like a man. LOL. I think I scared him when I answered the phone. He didn't know if that was my sleeping voice or sick voice. LOL. He apologized for waking me up but he said he couldn't wait until the morning to call me. The next day they were leaving out for their family vacation (Jade did mention that she would start on their water vacation LOL). Since they were leaving to go out of town and it was a holiday weekend, we had to schedule the appointment out until Monday. I called the donor nurse and made the appointment. She mentioned on the phone "I will let you know how the appointment goes with Jade" I said really fast "Oh no, I will be there. We are more on a friendship level than just a surrogate level." She said "Oh ok. That is really neat." I was thinking to myself, there is no way I'm missing anything this round. After all, this will be my child! :)

Let me back track a little, Jade went to her sister's surprise birthday party at the skating rink a week or so ago. She ended up falling and breaking her arm. She is now in a huge pink cast. :(

Last night I had a hard time falling asleep. I felt like I was going to my first day of school or something. I was so anxious and excited about todays appointment. I've been waiting what seems like forever for the day that Jade meets my AWESOME doctor. I've heard stories about the other doctors she has had to deal with in the past surrogacy routes and none of them seem as good as mine. I arrived to the doctors appointment a little early. I went out this past weekend and bought each nurse a little gift and even the receptionist. I was very excited to give them their gift and thank you card. Each of them have touched my life in a certain way. I thought they should know that and I wanted to give them a little something to show my thanks. I know it is hard to fill those shoes as a fertility nurse and even as a receptionist. You deal with emotional women who are strung out on fertility drugs (LOL), couples who are waiting for that day for their dreams to come true, and they all must be prepared for the worse. The receptionist always greets us with a huge smile that lights up the room. The nurses always have a smile on their face and deal with my OCD self with my million questions. Dr. Kim always takes his time with each appointment. He is never in a rush and would sit there 30 minutes answering questions if you continue to ask. I've never met a doctor who is so compassionate and one who cares as much as he does for his patients. I gave my doctor a thank you card and took the time to write a short little novel of how thankful I am for him. I wanted him to know that the days he feels defeated and unsuccessful to know that he has made a huge impact on my journey. We haven't reached our goal but I'm not giving up on him. After I handed out the gifts, Jade ended up arriving shortly later. I filled out all of her new paper work for her since she couldn't write with her hand that is in a cast. We turned in the paper work and one of my favorite nurses came out to introduce herself. She asked Jade "Oh my goodness, what happened to your arm? Jade responded with "I was saving a baby from a burning building." The nurse believed her and I busted out laughing. Jade then told her "No I  broke it in a fight." The nurse believed her again. I began to laugh again and Jade told her the truth. The nurse said "Yeah I would stick the first two stories" LOL After the introduction to the nurse and the short fib stories, we went to the back to get started. She gave a urine sample, got her blood drawn, and had an ultrasound. I was so happy that I didn't have to give blood this time. I did go over and snap a picture of her before she began to get blood drawn. I went back and talked to her a little bit while they were taking her blood. I couldn't believe that I actually watched. I couldn't watch for long because it made me sick. I don't even watch when they take blood from me. After the blood draw, we went into the room to get ready for the ultrasound. It was so weird not sitting on the table myself and getting the ultrasound. I told Jade that I was playing the role of Mikie. LOL. It is crazy to his side of the journey now that Jade is in my shoes. When we got into the room Jade said "You just thought you and Kristina were close. Me and you are about to get real close. You are about to see my insides." I was cracking up...this girl is CRAZY! She is so silly and was on her game today with jokes. Doctor Kim came in and introduced himself and did the ultrasound. Her lining looked great! (Which is a good sign) He didn't see anything abnormal. He was very pleased with the ultrasound. He prescribed her birth control that she starts tonight. We made an appointment for Friday for her to go back to get her lining checked. It is the only appointment that I wont be going to. Its an in office procedure and I think she would be more comfortable doing it alone without me all up in her business. LOL! But then the more I think about it the more I want to go. I may change my mind. Anyways, after the ultrasound we began to talk about medicine protocol. We went over what medicine she would be on. She was relieved to know that she wouldn't be on vaginal inserts. She told Dr Kim "I'm glad that I wont be on those coochy pills" I almost fell out of my chair. He said "No we do injections" She said "I'm so glad to hear that. I cant stand a leak vagina." I was laughing so hard. She was being so honest but she was cracking me up with her honesty. Dr. Kim laughed as well. Jade is very OCD about things and has been dying to have a calendar. We spoke to the nurse about the calendar. We decided that Friday she will do her in office procedure, next Friday the 17th we will do our therapy session, the following Monday April 20 we will do blood work and stop birth control, April 24th she will start medicine, and May 14 would be the transfer day. All those dates are not set in stone but if all goes as planned that is what we are looking at. I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited. The awesome thing is that Jade is just as excited as me. She wants the transfer day to come sooner than I do. I thought I was anxious and impatient but she is way worse than me. HA! I feel good about that and Dr. Kim mentioned to me that it is good to have a Gestational Carrier who is OCD.

Well looks like things are moving right along. A week ago I posted a blog stating that next week is another week and little did I know that we would be where we are today. Contract has been finalized and just needs to be notarized. The lawyer sent the release to my doctor to proceed. The first check up and ultrasound is under our belt too. Jade has met the doctor and nurses. Next it is her in office procedure to check her lining, therapy, and then final check up before meds start. I know these next few weeks are going to fly by. I'm so thankful for my doctor, HFI Katy location women, my family, The Ohl family, and all of our supporters! We wouldn't have made it this far if it wasn't for everyones continued prayers and support. I appreciate all of you who have reached out to me. I know a few have said they feel like "creepers" on my facebook. Please send me a friend request, I've accepted more people this past few months than I ever imagined. Do not feel like a creeper. I appreciate all of you reaching out and sending your good luck wishes and kind thoughts. Its been a tough journey but I wouldn't change anything. I'm a better person today than I was when I started this journey. My day will soon come and I will have a little look a like calling me that three letter word "MOM" and Mikie will have a little daddy's girl calling him "DAD".

Jade getting ready to get her blood drawn!

Snuggles with my handsome little nephew, Hutch!

I'm so happy for my Dad. He has finally used his hard working money to purchase his corvette. He has worked so hard and is finally starting to do stuff and purchase things to use his hard working money. He purchased a 1986 corvette the year I was born. Now he has purchased a 2015 and I hope this is a good sign that he will have a grandchild soon. :)